Jan, 13 2019

Dating 101: Stop Doing These on Your First Date

Author Aulia Meidiska

First date: all about the butterflies in your stomach, the blush on your cheeks, the nervous system in your veins. Everything is bright, everything is right.


Umm.. wait, hold on love masters! You probably will do these on your first date so get back here for a while and remind yourself not to do these anymore.


Overselling yourself

No one loves to hear some brags. Especially someone who just knows you for the shortest time of her or his life. We sometimes don’t realize and get carried away with the conversation, overselling ourselves to our date. I have met some guys who told me it was kinda intimidating for them to digest the overselling information. Nothing is wrong about giving good first impression. It is just annoying when it is a lot of them because it sounds like talking nonsense.


Talking too much about yourself

Lessen the ‘I’, please. Being on a date (or in a relationship afterwards) is not merely about you. There is time to speak, there is time to listen. So the time you hear yourself pronouncing the ‘I” more than 1,000 times on a date, it is the time you should feel sorry for your dating partner. If you think that your partner is more passive, then try to make him or her talk more. Take turn to use the ‘I’.


Being cheesy most of the time

Especially to guys out there. Please stop being cheesy all the time. You have to know when to pull the brake. For once in awhile every one hour is still fine.But for every 15 mins. Ugh...it is a red sign for girls.


Behaving like being with The Queen of England

And to girls out there. You are not invited by The Queen of England. No need to practice your highly royal manner. Be who you are then you’ll be appreciated even more. [Again] giving good first impression is okay but not too much. Trying to be a girl who behaves as if a high-maintenance princess is just a bad luck to get a genuine boy. It is possible that later he will fake it to make it, too.


Playing hard to get

You are not playing roles of Catch Me If You Can. So don’t pretend that you don’t want him or her by playing hard to get. Your dignity will not be loosened up just because you directly tell him or her that you are interested to spend more time or that you have a good feeling about the date. Be real, be someone who does not want to cease the opportunity of embarking upon a memorable dating session.


Keeping the silence for more than 5 minutes

Silence is no good, babes. Believe me. It is the process of running out topics. Worst is when it lasts for more than 5 minutes. Uh-oh. Not good. I have dated a guy with appealing look but no more than that. We just threw out the small talk for two hours and a lot of silent gaps, finding something to connect but we failed. When finally I was released from his sight, I was totally relieved.


Collecting too much information all at once

The prior point should be balanced by this last-but-not-least point. Although you need to keep up with the conversation but try not to be nosy all at the same time. This is related to personal information including past relationships, family, and other possibly sensitive topics. No, no. It is not for the first date, mates!


Illustration by @febiramdhan


Read more: 5 Tricks to Deal with an Introvert Partner

TAGS :   love   relationship   first date   dating 101   dating rules   tips