Jan, 12 2019

Dating Rules #7: First Date: Talk about dirty jokes?

Author Aulia Meidiska

Some of us may want to impress our date on the first time we meet by saying nice things, giving compliments or smart jokes. But some of us may want to be themselves and feel free to tell dirty jokes. Not all the time, just a little bit. Well, I am the second one. Sometimes I think that it’s okay to tell dirty jokes on the first date just to let my date know my true color so he knows what kind of problem he needs to deal with.


However, sometimes I misled men by my dirty jokes. They often thought I am that kind of lady who is open for such dirty business. In fact, I often open the discussion of dirty things to make them comfortable around me so they don’t have to fake anything and can say anything. Sadly, this makes them too comfortable and often allows them to believe that I am a certain easy woman to sleep with.


Then I opened a poll about this topic. Surprisingly, different people have different opinion regarding this matter. Meet Billy Fabianto, a director and co-founder of Mint, a video agency in Jakarta. He opted the button BIG NO, crowding 29% with all the voters. When asked, he explained, “Mostly those girls will think I am a pervert as in our country Indonesia, specifically Jakarta, many girls think dirty jokes are taboo to be in the conversation. Not only for the first date but for all dates.”


It does not mean he never slipped out once or twice. When it came to more than one dates, he confessed to tell his date a dirty word. Suddenly the girl was just in silence. On his mind his date would probably say, “Oh good, I’m dating a pervert just wait until he wants to grope me.” Although he does not instantly leave the girl or anything. He totally respects the girls even when they can’t take the dirty jokes and it’s totally okay for him not to shoot the words forever.


Supporting the voters on the other side, Mudita Nathania, a veterinarian based in Jakarta, goes with “If politely it’s okay”.  She does not think it will be really a matter if the guy she is dating not telling the jokes just to flash the sign of making out or to let her know about sexual thingy he may do to her in nearly future. For example the guy shows her meme about dirty joke to find it funny, she does not think it is forbidden.


“Actually so far, I have not yet dated a dirty minded guy. To me maybe it needs half a year to really be fine with his true color if he is someone with a dirty joke. But it is not like something I would try to change from him. And if the guy sometimes uses censored words I don’t consider him telling me a dirty jokes, it is just kind of his personality and I have to accept it.”


Well, in this case, which answer suits your opinion? Let me know what you think on the comment below.